...is a bitch. I've had a rough couple of days. I've fallen back into old habits, and talked that crazy talk. I'm not gonna lie...it scares me. But, I have a couple of theories as far as why, and so I'm now eliminating as much of the cause as I can. Yesterday, I was ashamed of myself. I was disappointed. I was angry. But, this morning, I woke up in a different frame of mind. I think that setbacks are normal on any course to significant change. So I'm not going to beat myself up over it. It's just a reminder of the work I still need to do, and that this work is never easy and never done. But I guess it wouldn't be "work" if it was easy. I feel like there's a demon version of myself, and the past couple of days I've been fighting her off in some sort of low-budget horror movie. I guess I was successful because I'm still here, and she's not, or at least she's back in her hole where she belongs. But that's not good enough. Someday, she'll be completely gone. Blown into oblivion by my happiness, confidence, and self-awareness. Kind of like the Care Bear stare ;-)
Yesterday, I felt hopeless. Today, I'm forgiving myself and moving forward with my eye on the prize.
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